Comparison

So the other night I was having a conversation with a good friend. She was telling me how much she was enjoying my blog. That floored me first of all, like I have said and will keep saying, I did this for myself and figured no one would read it. But I am SO happy people are reading and that is making them think, making them feel. And I hope all of that will continue and that if something touches you that you will share it with someone. We are all fighting the same battles just in different ways and that allows us to help each other. I finally started blogging because I felt very strongly that something I might say, something I have been through, something I have learned might help someone else.

This good friend said that she thinks I am saying things that a lot of people feel. She said, “and that’s why I love your blog… because if you just looked at you… you’d think you had it made… but it’s a daily struggle at times to be yourself”. (Honestly, it’s a daily struggle most of the time.)

What she said really struck a chord with me. We walk around daily being the only person that knows what is going on in our head. What we are struggling with. All of those things that we hide from the world and no one else sees. Sometimes we are dying in side needing help but we don’t want to ask for it. Yet we compare ourselves to the version of our friend, our neighbor, our family member that we do see. We think it isn’t fair that they have it made, have no struggles, aren’t fighting any battles, don’t have issues, that they don’t need help. Why do we have to deal with all that we do and they have the “perfect life”. But that is 100% NOT true. Inside they are battling their own demons, fighting their own fights, needing help. No one is exempt from this.

I was a pro at comparing myself with every single person on the planet. Why am I the size I am and she gets to be skinny? I wish I had her hair. Why does she get to go on all the dates while I sit at home? I wish my arms were toned like hers. I wish I had her skin. I wish, I wish, I wish…I still compare but try hard to tell myself to stop it and appreciate the things about me that are different from others. This planet would be so boring if we were all the same! Our strengths and weaknesses complement each other, we have those differences so that we need each other. So that we seek relationships with people that will benefit both of us. We were all made different and individual for a reason.

It has taken me a long time to figure this out. And I still struggle with remembering this but am constantly reminding myself and trying to be better about it. People, STOP COMPARING!!! It’s too bad we can’t just all try our hardest to be kind to ourselves. To lift up others the best we can and to just be happy and celebrate our differences, our strengths and weaknesses. That is part of what makes life so great.

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